Giving people near and far the benefit of the doubt as often as possible about the little mundane things in life helps make you a force for good and the World, in general, a better place.
In the final sum of things, though, it probably helps you most of all. It helps to keep stress levels low and keeps you focused on more of what you want rather than fussing about all you see that you don’t appreciate.
It helps to realize in advance the kinds of relationship transactions you prefer and to appreciate them when you see them. You can also lean towards patience with others by knowing that everyone is doing the best they can at the moment, just like you are.
There are many ways to define personal power. Here are some to consider.
Personal power is being in control of your life.
Personal power is the ability to achieve what you want.
Personal power equals the control of resources.
Powerful people are focused on their goals.
Powerful people take impactful action.
Personal power is the ability to influence others.
Personal power is freedom.
ON A SCALE FROM WEAKEST TO STRONGEST
Now, of course, power can be used positively or negatively. It has been said that being forceful is the weakest power of all. Brute strength often only yields negativity and resentment; and only short term gain. A much stronger use of power is to use charm and positive influence to help others build their power. This is a much longer-lasting strategy with easily seen benefits including increasing the power of the initial charmer.
TUNE IN
Be an observer of yourself throughout your days. Take periodic attitude checks. Begin to recognize when you feel apathy, negativity, or just generally stuck. Use those feelings as a signal to alert you that you have lost touch with your personal power. Once you are able to recognize what it feels like when your power is depleted, then you can start to experiment and find what works to make you feel powerful again. At that point, you will be cued into a key cycle that you can use to manage yourself to success.
FOR A POWER BOOST
Think about a time when you had power and let your body and your mind feel it.
Practice non-reaction. Don’t let others goad you. Instead pause. Respond calmly when thoughtful and ready.
People can be real jerks sometimes. I know you know that. Just because someone else is choosing to feel miserable or to be negative doesn’t mean you have to let that invade your energy level. You don’t have to focus on that. You can maintain your vibe so they don’t bring you down to theirs. Here’s the trick: Use their negativity as a reminder.
Use it as a reminder of how you don’t want to be and why. Hint: One has to be feeling pretty bad to be so negative.
Remember that they are free to create just like you are.
Use it to remind you of the opposite emotion or vibration and how you do want to feel. This is a technique called “Pivoting” that Esther Hicks coined years ago.
Use it appreciation the wisdom you have about how you can focus differently and feel better.
Use it to set intentions for how you want to feel going forward.
Use it to remember the importance of controlling your focus.
For example, if someone treats you badly or is negative or gruff, instead of letting them dominate the airwaves, use them as a cue in your own mind to think, “Boy, do I appreciate that I’m not miserable or upset or angry like that person.” And then maybe think something like, “That reminds me that I always want to be kind, that I want to be happy, gentle, and kind,” and “It makes me appreciate the goodness I notice in most people.” This reaction is better than getting hung up focusing on their negativity which would certainly bring your vibe down and cause you to notice more negativity in the future.
To the extent that you can clear that type of negativity out of your zone, all the better but it’s not necessary. Even in ongoing relationships, it just takes one person shining brightly to dominate with positive vibes and uplift others by doing so. A big part of it is to realize that you don’t have control of them and what they are choosing to focus on. And, it takes unconditional love. They don’t have to be different in order for you to love them. Understand, they are doing the best they can at the moment, just like you are. Don’t even waste your energy trying to change them. Love them where they are. Keep a light focus if you don’t like what you see, or look the other way. Know they can rise to meet you on a higher level of vibration whenever they want to. They may want to sooner rather than later when they see how much fun you’re having up there.
